Irritated.

Father,

I dunno whether is this unholy a not but I really feel so irritated by the way they are treating the ministry and doing things. I really feel so wronged by their actions and behaviours and I really want to speak right into their face to rebuke their mistakes. But yet I do not want to do it because firstly, I do not know whether is it right to rebuke straight into their face, second, I dunno why are they giving this type of attitude and face, and thirdly, I dunno whether doing that can solve this problem a not or rather make it worse.

Seriously father I am very irritated and burdened and upset by the way these circumstances are. It felt like if nobody bothers about the kingdom and everybody is so complacent with their life and the way they are doing things. It feels like if I am the only one driving and the others are all slacking. What happen to those who proclaim they will hold strong and will stand firm for God? Now they show me attitudes and black face everywhere they go.

I feel really burden by the situation now. I really feel like doing something, but my ability is so limited. I am so small, and the situation is so big. How am I going to make a difference over here? Yes.. Unless with you Lord, whom which make everything possible. GOD PLEASE use me! Use me as your vessel to move the people's heart, as a salt and light in your church, as a good motivator for people, as a good encourager for fellow christians. I really want to be used by you to spur them to serve in your kingdom! I know its not going to be easy.. But Im willing to go through all the tough times for you! Allow me to go through all of that for you, in your NAME.

I really want to lead them out of their comfort zone, and go all the way out for you God. Though I am be imperfect and have many loopholes in my life, but I sincerely repent and want to be mould by you. I know I can never be perfect because of my sins and shame, but I trust in your forgiveness in which I never take for granted, and never wanted to. Please God give me a greater conviction to do this for you, not for my glory, but for your glory to be revealed.

I just pray right now at this moment Lord, you will strike JOELLA's HEART with guilt and shame, of what she have perform and behave during the cg meeting.. For what she has done is not of a faithful lover of the Holy Spirit, but rather those are acts that disobey the fruits of the spirit. Why have she behave in that way? Why does she portray discouragement? Why does she initiate a heck care attitude? Which is so unbiblical and unloving and disrespectful to you my Lord. I still want to love her, I still want to bless her, and pray for her. So Lord please kindly, though I do not understand, you will, and you will help her to learn her mistakes and wrongs and quickly change herself in this, in repentance of her deeds.

And I dunno what's wrong with the leadership in SP.. why are they so drop dead? each seems to be complacent with the comfort zone they are situated and none seems like wanting to move forward. I feel so discontented! So unconvicted! So upset by this scenario! Father Please I pray you will move them forward and drive them in! Spur and drill them for the harvest that is to come! Let them have this urgency for the harvest! Dun let them miss the harvest that is here! PLEASE GOD! Help SP wake up and listen to the call! Receive the call!

USE ME USE ME.

I AM WILLING.

I MAY NOT BE ABLE.

BUT I AM HUMBLE BEFORE YOU,
WILLING TO BE USED BY YOU.

USE ME USE ME.