my prayers.

God you know I am a little bit doubtful of what's taking place around me,
and I am really fearful these discernment that I receive,
whether are they truely from you,
or are they from the devil, here to push me into traps.


My God.. I have this different feeling towards lennon.
he just seems so insecure already.
He just seems like, he totally lost it.
Just lost it.
and the way he ask me things is like if,
im not doing anything?
I just feel like asking him, Hello? U're not here with me,
how can you understand what we're going thru?
But then... this is my faulty..
He is still my leader, and where's my respect when I think like tt?
I am sinful woman.
But it just seems after so much has happen,
i can't bring myself to respect him and trust him as much as before already.

You know God, I really like want to see what's going on..
Thus God may I pray to you Lord,
tell me what's happening here, give me a confirmation,
an assurance about lennon, so I know exactly what's wrong with him.
I know this can't be wrong, there must be a whole lot of stuffs in him.
I dunno whether I can help him a not, I think I can't..
But if you're going to use me, Im willing. Im really willing.

And there's this insecure feeling in me as well..
It seems like im trying to take things into my hand..
God why am I doing this and taking my future into my own plans!
Ur tots are higher than mine, so are your ways.
Oh how foolish am I to do this..
Forgive me my Lord for my folly, forgive what I've did..
Now I learnt and repent, I hand over my future to you.
I shall not want, I shall not pursue after image ministry.
According to your purpose, if you want me to pioneer,
Lord you will call me to it.
But meanwhile,I follow where you place me,
and see to what it is going to happen.
It is not going to be my plans anymore,
but rather it is going to be a time for me to follow ur plans.
Only yours will I obey.

Help me my king, overcome my insecurity.
My insecurity towards myfuture.
And forgive me for trying to head my own way.
I am sinful for this, I did wrong for this. Forgive me.

And my king I just want to pray for my fellow leaders.
Seems like alot of people are sick recently.
First Lord, I Pray you'll heal them,
heal barnabas, heal joella, heal randall. and any other whom I do not know are sick.
Whatever illnesses they have in their body,
Lord may you remove it from them,
so they can be well and healthy,
and not harassby the pain and weariness brought by the illness.
And Father I just pray for barnabas,
that Lord you will burn him once again.
Help him to recover from his breakdown,
and stand up again!
Father help him to be anointed by your spirit,
so that he can learn to be driven,
and be spirited by you.

I pray for randall,
she will be freed from all the emotions that she have towards lennon,
and also she will be freed from problems of relationships.
Once again I pray for your power to continue and work among us,
to unite our relationship in great bond,
so may we continue to serve in unity for the unit.

I pray for joella,
she will recover from this moodiness she is having.
and I will also have a strong discerning heart from you,
so that I can understand what's going on,
and be able to make the correct decision according to you.

Oh lord....

I pray for more of our SP people to be able to come for the camp!
Lord may you challenge in their hearts to make it for camp!
Help them by making a way out for them so they can come...
For Lord this camp will be a camp where many can be touch by you,
its a great opportunity.. Lord I dun want anyone to miss it!
PLEASE LORD! help them and challenge them to come!

And I just pray Lord... help me to get the job at paya lebar..
TO work together with huiru and jolene..
Lord I really need this job, to pay back the money for the camp..
and also to repay alot of people who I own money..
Help me God to get the job, so that I can save up money,
and pay for the sch fees nxt semester.

Please Lord... help me to grow.. I want to grow up, and be mature..
So that I can serve greater for your kingdom, for your people.
I dun want to just be praying for myself,
but I pray that I will be expanded, so as to be use by you,
to expand many others u willl like to.
Help me to hold fast on your vision for me,
and Lord help me to grow strong for you in your church.

Take away jealousy in me,
that create many negative tots in my mind.
Lord I do not want to have those unholy tots in me,
that will dirty and condemn your holy purposes.
I want to have a pure heart, a clear mind for you,
so that I will not contaminate your kingdom n church.
So Lord, not let me be jealous.
But help me to seriously be upright and righteous for you.

I WANT MORE OF YOU,
I WANT TO GROW FOR YOU.