BLOOD.

I really feel like killin myself.
No, not to commit suicide,
I feel like slicing myself up.
Torturing myself.
I feel like, its going to feel good..

I saw myself cutting myself up,
and yet feeling good..
I was smiling, laughing,
when the pain caught my heart.
The blood just flow continuously,
and that makes me feel, even better..

It feels so crazy, so evil, so mad.
But yet it seems like that thought,
is capturing me.

I dun want to feel like this!
But yet Im just so caught inside..
I can't even worship God nowadays,
Im just so sinful.
I can't even pray in tongues,
Im not worthy to use it..
I am just like if a piece of rubbish in the house of God,
not suppose to appear in heaven.

I hate myself.
I hate everybody.
I am bitter with everything in this world,
even myself, because I am just rubbish.
Not worthy to even be talked about.
I am so so angry.
Filled with wrath in my mind and body.
I feel like murdering her.
KILL HER.

The knife become so beautiful.
I love it.
Especially when it is stained with blood.

I am so scary, I am so evil.
I am like the devil.





























Im so scared!
It actually feels good to think of these things...
My God... Im falling away...................................

Help me, my last call before I drift too far away.